spaghetti cat

have you seen Spaghetti Cat? google it. absurdity.

so, Andy and I have decided to start saying "Spaghetti Cat" instead of using bad language (to us, bad language is saying "what the eff?"), or even when we are experiencing frustration or ridiculousness and can't phrase what we're feeling. "Spaghetti Cat" just says it all. Plus, if I'm tempted to say a bad word, forcing my mind to transition helps me to recognize sinful habits and also puts my focus on something silly instead of something negative.

we went to Winchester on Saturday night to see Andy's adorable fam and decided to get Checkers before hitting the road. we leeeerve Checkers. obsessed. guess what? it's all boarded up. you've got to be kidding me. SPAGHETTI CAT.

the trash can that resides a few feet from my desk is about a foot to the left of where it normally is located. sure, I could move it. instead, I just get angry/giggly every time I toss a tissue or wrapper over and it lands on the floor instead of in the can. SPAGHETTI CAT.

okay, get this...
I've caught myself unbuttoning my pants at work while still on the way to the bathroom. AAAHHHH spaghetti cat!!!!!

31 x 3

My friend over at RamblingRachel is doing 31 blog posts (for the month of March) where she writes about 3 things each day (because March is the 3rd month, n00b). Rachel is one of two best friends that I cannot remember not knowing because we've been friends since birth! She has a huge heart and is insanely talented. Love you, Rachie Roon!

I loved her 31 post challenge and asked if I could use the idea. Instead of posting daily, I'm going to knock out all 31 right here, right now. Booya.

Three names you go by.  other than Laura... Louie Dew (by my sis), Moosh (by my mom) and Moot (by my best friend Laurel)

Three facts about yourself.  I love Jeopardy. I make myself laugh. I have an incredibly strong sense of smell.

Three things that happened today. I interviewed a chef who has cooked for several presidents, I ate half of a Charlie's Cheeseburger for lunch and two minutes ago I cleaned up a shocking amount of dog poo, which was shocking in itself because Casey has messed in the house probably 4 times total since we brought her home from the SPCA

Three favorite songs right now.  "Blindsided" by Bon Iver, "All Around" by The Glorious Unseen and "Something in the Water" by Brooke Fraser (none of these are new songs, but they're what I'm listening to)

Three breakfast foods you enjoy. Cereal, bacon, hash browns

Three things on your current to-do list. Clean out and organize all closets in the house, finish my video editing job and figure out what we're going to eat for dinner since I forgot to go to the store

Three colors you like. Olive green, plum, navy

Three words you think others would use to describe you. Friendly, generous, funny (that was an awkward one to answer)

Three objects you can’t be without.  cell phone, lip balm, something to read

Three ways to win your heart. Ask me to spend time with you. Compliment me. Pray for me.

Three favorite movies. You've Got Mail, Little Women and the newer Sabrina are ones I watch at least once a year, but in general I prefer drama and war movies to chick flicks

Three appetizers you enjoy. CALAMARI. bloomin' onion. eggrolls.

Three places you’ve lived. with family in northern VA, with 11 other girls in a house near JMU, with my husband and pooch in Harrisonburg 

Three important people in your life. OK, other than my family, because there are 6 of them and that's not fair-- Laurel, who believes the best in me; Jenny, who has fostered my relationship with God; Kristen, who despite the stress and busy-ness of her life overseas, makes me feel special whenever we talk

Three things you want to say to three different people Andy- I think it's a grilled cheese and soup night. Amy- I miss you, can we please talk for hours soon? Kelly- thank you for reminding me that I'm not the only one who makes mistakes.

Three things that made you happy today. Being complimented on my story by my boss. Being told I was the best reporter my source has ever spoken with. Eating my leftover cheeseburger.

Three things you want to do before you die. Go on a missions trip. Become a mother. Travel overseas with Andy for a long vacation.

Three favorite TV shows. Top Chef. The Office. 30 Rock.

Three home-cooked meals you enjoy.  Cornflake chicken with whipped cream potatoes. Enchilada casserole. Chili.

Three things the world would be better without. OK, I'm going with a lighthearted answer on this one-- dust, semi-trucks, High Fructose Corn Syrup

Three of your guilty pleasures. stationary, mochas WITH whipped cream, fashion magazines

Three things you are afraid of. not being able to breathe. scorpions (thanks a lot, "Hook"). losing someone I love.

Three places you want to visit. South Africa, New Zealand, Greece 

Three things you do before you go to bed. use the bathroom. read. use the bathroom again.

Three favorite books. the Bible (I mean that), Coming Home, Don't Let's Go to the Dog's Tonight

Three types of deserts you enjoy. Cannoli, triple chocolate cheesecake (the one at Barnes and Noble), ice cream

Three crazy things you wouldn’t mind doing. Sky-diving (I don't think it's crazy, some people do), P90x (okay, this is crazy, but I am doing it starting next week), eating something freaky

Three things you like about yourself. I make people laugh. I like that I like to read (I'm sad that so many people don't). I'm compassionate.

Three things that you look for in a partner. Humor, integrity, intelligence

Three life lessons you’ve learned so far. God's plan is better than my plan. It's more important to think of others than to think of yourself. A little love goes a long way.

Three ways you bid farewell. Cya :)  Good talking to you!  Love you!

notes from a college graduate

There I was, ready to dive into all that is college. I had spent the summer pouring over JMU's student life handbook, sketching floor plans for my dorm room (true story- just ask my freshman year roommate) and wondering who I would meet and what I would learn.

I knew college would mean freedom. I didn't realize it would be an every-day type of freedom. Freedom to choose when to wake up, whether or not to go to class, what to eat, who to spend time with, where to go, how to spend my time.

I didn't know the people I would meet would challenge me and mold me into a better version of myself.

It's funny, I still refer to time in semesters. I wonder when that will change.

back to business

one more note on my grandma::  a distant cousin of mine played the bagpipes at the end of my grandma's funeral mass and then again at her burial. oh.my.gosh. instant tears. can music be stunning? yes. it was stunning. just like my grandma.

tuesday was a day of recuperating.

wednesday was Andy's birthday. we went for a hike in shenandoah natl. park and I made a huge pot of clam chowder for dinner. kevin and jackie got andy a blizzard cake and we had them and simone and dan over and andy got to argue with the boys about coffee and football. he had a good day.

today I prepped veggies for chicken fried rice that I'm taking to a friend tomorrow. I moved furniture around in the basement and created a second guest room and a second home office. I unpacked books from my grandma's apartment. I did laundry. I made pumpkin pie. I went to the gym. I cooked turnips for the first time. I had a good day.

It feels good to be back.

why am I writing when I have a million things to do?!!?!

3 miles at gym- cried while watching Dr. Phil.

showered and got ready- almost cried again thinking about Dr. Phil

parked on Grattan St. and walked to Top Dog on campus- almost cried because each step to get there was so familiar and I wanted so badly to be going in as a student and not an alumni and the freshman looked like such babies and then my sadness/sentimentality lifted because the menu had changed and there are now dumpling MEALS so I got thai chicken basil dumplings with noodles and thai sauce and it was delicious.

now I'm home and I have laundry to put away and I have to pack for Rockbridge (going to a retreat center to chaperone the Aletheia youth group while we serve the JMUers there for the weekend) AND I have a jillion dishes and vases and wine glasses to put away because we got a gorgeous china cabinet from my grandma and my stuff is currently covering every square inch of my kitchen counters.

phew. well, I'm already exhausted (but thankfully not in tears).

not so busy at home

I guess you could say I took the day off of not working, but I got all but one thing done on my to-do list for the day. My tasks took about 1/4 of the time I thought they would. I wanted to get my glasses prescription figured out at Costco (my new ones give me a headache), take some clothes to Plato's Closet and Goodwill, go to the gym and read. I thought the Costco errand would take ages because the Harrisonburg Costco's optical center isn't directly affiliated with the one in Springfield, which is where I had my prescription made. It's all very confusing.

Well, I figured my errands+the gym would take all afternoon and that I could have the morning to do my reading. I woke up around nine thirty, called the dog to get up on the bed, snuggled and day-dreamed for a while and then decided to read a book. I had started The Carousel by Rosamunde Pilcher last night but only got a few pages in. It's only two hundred some pages and I wanted to see if I could finish the whole thing by 11am. I finished at 10:52! It was a good story to read in bed.

Then I did pretty much nothing for a solid hour and a half, which is rather depressing. Oh wait, I did the dishes. Whoopee. My errands took all of half an hour (the lady at Costco said I should make myself wear my glasses for a week because I'm used to my old/bad prescription and I just need to adjust, I got $3.30 from Plato's Closet for two shirts that were worth over $80, went to Goodwill to donate for the first time and realized it's as easy as dumping items in a box) so I went to Barnes and Noble and browsed and read some of Gods and Generals and sipped cinnamon tea for an hour and a half. It was marvelous. I put in 3 miles at the gym, 1.7 on the the elliptical and 1.3 on the treadmill. After my shower I trimmed my nails, plucked my eyebrows and went to Bible study with DRY hair and NOT wearing sweatpants and a t-shirt and looking like a hot mess. That was marvelous too.

As unproductive as this day was compared to yesterday, indulging in reading was lovely. Today was restful, which I am glad for. Tomorrow will be busy, which I am also glad for.

What really made my day, though, was a card in the mail from my friend Amy. She wrote the sweetest note of encouragement for me as I try to figure out a job situation and what God's plan is for me right now. Snail mail has got to be one of my top five favorite things to receive. The rest? Hm. Affection, gifts, phone calls from close friends and forgiveness.

a bouquet of freshly sharpened pencils

appropriate You've Got Mail quote: "Don't you love New York in the fall? It makes me wanna buy school supplies. I would send you a bouquet of newly sharpened pencils if I knew your name and address."

What is it with school supplies? How can pens and notebooks be so exciting? They just are! At least half of my girl friends are obsessed with school supplies. Maybe that's why we are friends.

School supplies signify not learning so much, but doodling the names of your crushes, practicing your new and totally way more cool handwriting (come on, I'm not the only one who did that), writing poems or songs and designing floor plans. Yes, I did that. Since seventh grade. I love a good floor plan.

I am not looking forward to the expense of future school supply lists, but I get all giddy at the thought of picking out fun-colored folders and tricked out binders with my future kids. I'll let you in on a secret: I've already bought my future child a notebook. It was too awesome not to buy. It has tiny robots all over the cover! I added it to my "hope chest" which is really a cardboard box that used to house a printer. Now it holds little things that I've bought over the past couple of years for our future children.

Children is a REALLY ugly word. 

rearranging

> our budget. I am currently unemployed, so my paycheck will no longer go towards paying off the van and adding to our savings. Andy and I sat down to take a long look at where our money is going and it's pretty disgusting how quickly things add up when you're using one income to pay for everything AND the car payment AND padding savings. At the same time, it's disgusting to think about how easy it has been for us to spend money.

> my days. I can't stand having nothing to do, especially when "nothing" = I could organize my closet, go through our over-flowing box of odds and ends, scrub the drip pans... stuff I may as well do but don't necessarily feel like doing. This week is the perfect opportunity to get those not-so-nothings taken care of.

> our furniture. Well, not quite yet, but soon. We're getting my grandma's dining room table and chairs, china cabinet and chaise lounge. Andy is beside himself about the chaise (truly. it's adorable) and has already come up with a new arrangement plan for our living room furniture to accommodate it.

> my diet. I haven't been this happy about myself or had this much energy since before last Christmas! I'm consuming way less calories than I was a week ago but I'm not having any issues with it. I haven't gone to bed hungry. TESTIMONIAL: Yesterday I only ate half of a chocolate cupcake. HALF. I couldn't believe it, either! Oh and get this: I didn't eat a single bagel or pastry at church this morning. I LIVED for Sunday morning bagels and pastries! It wasn't like I didn't want it, but the choice to pass it up was much easier than I ever would have expected. I did not want to go home and have all those calories and carbs messing up my so far so good daily nutritional breakdown.

> my fitness. Chuckle. I had the whole sedentary, maaaybe lightly active thing going on for a while there. It was pretty lame. Whenever I start becoming the definition of lazy (like my friend Ariel) I think of freshman year of high school and jogging two miles each afternoon for field hockey. I remember struggling with the distance and overcoming it by jogging/sprinting the straights of the track and walking the curves (according to a runner friend of mine that is a terrible way to build endurance, but it worked wonders for me). I remember how my body changed and how it didn't take long for my body to enjoy the workout. Now that I'm back in the gym I don't let myself leave until I've  completed at least two miles, even if some of it is done on the treadmill instead of elliptical. My body doesn't enjoy it yet, but it's only been four days! I'm trying to decide if my end goal should be to add speed or distance. Thoughts?

a weight on my back (and everywhere else too)

I have been trying to lose weight since the beginning of the year with absolutely zero results. In fact, I've gained a few more pounds since then. There are a lot of factors: I stopped exercising. I was eating sugars and carbs like there was no tomorrow. I ate out a lot. I ate a lot of ice cream. I changed birth control pills. I spent a lot of time on the couch watching Netflix and Hulu and checking emails and reading blogs. All of these things, plus the fact that I'm five years older (blasted hormone levels), have contributed to why I no longer look like this: 

At Blue Hole circa fall 2005
look at those tiny arms! I mourn those tiny arms!

Weight wise, the past year has been pretty miserable. I didn't talk about it for a loooong time because I didn't want to be one of those people who complains about their weight and then doesn't do anything about it. I really thought I was trying...I would make more healthful dinners, eat salads for lunch, walk the dog...but I never had the endurance to keep up the good habits. I hated not being able to hide it. For a long time I refused to buy new clothes because I didn't want to be accepting a body that I didn't want. 

Here's the thing about weight. We're all different. I have friends who lead healthier lifestyles than I do who are the same size or bigger than I am. A lot of it has to do with genes, and my genes say I'm supposed to be thin with a booty. I know my "happy" weight and I know I'm not at it right now, and guess what? I'm not happy about that! I'm extremely disappointed in myself. 

So here's what I'm doing about it: On Monday I decided to start being completely honest with myself about what I put into my mouth and how much exercise I get. I made a profile on sparkpeople.com, which lets me track my meals and how much I work out. I also bought a digital scale for weigh-ins and dug out the food scale that I've had for months and never used. I am hoping to reach my weight goal by my 24th birthday. A present to myself!

head above water

I don't think I have ever had to schedule time for myself. Time to take a breath. Time to not think about everything else. I've never had such a busy summer, either. I've gotten some great time with Andy, with family and with friends, but I don't count that as time for myself. My mind has been constantly racing with tasks that need completing, people I need to contact, events I can't forget about...it just goes on and on and on and on. The commercial for Jello Mousse Temptations where the ad says "It's Me O'Clock" really annoys me, but I want a me o'clock! I would love to be able to think about all the things I have to do in a day and remind myself that at x time I had a date with an armchair at B&N. 

When I nanny I have time to read or watch television while the children sleep. It normally satisfies my need for "me time," but I've noticed lately that even when their house is quiet, I can't quiet myself! I write to do lists or meal plans or even silly notes like ways we can save money when we have children. My novel is littered with scribbled-on scraps of paper. I took a few minutes to read while waiting on my ride to Bible study and instead of reading my novel I was distracted by all of the tiny notes and I read them instead! Not so relaxing.

Thankfully I have this time right now. This doesn't feel particularly relaxing, but that's probably because I'm blogging about not being relaxed. So, I have eaten a bowl of Special K Chocolate Delight (amazing) and put on George Winston's "Summer" album and here I am, blogging away and attempting to keep my head above water. When I'm done with this post I will lay out my workout clothes so that I can sleep in as long as possible and then I will crawl under the covers, read some 1 Corinthians and maybe a chapter of my novel, snuggle with Andy and hopefully have a solid night's sleep. Aaaand that sounds so good that I'm going to stop right here.

a piece of my grandmother

I am receiving a few pieces of furniture from my Grandma Jean, one of which my parents had waiting for me in the van on Friday. It's the most beautiful sewing cabinet and I just want to hug it.

gorgeous woodwork

the top flips open into two pieces and the sewing machine comes out from underneath

so many cute compartments!

these ones flip out! 

$%*#@& toothpicks!

Andy and I have had a constant struggle in our marriage. It revolves around the toothpicks. I would prefer it if  toothpicks didn't exist in our home at all, but that will never happen. Andy likes to stick one behind his ear after dinner and then eventually pick his teeth and hold the toothpick on the side of his mouth for hours. l am disgusted by this and have told him that many times. Our original compromise was that he would use the toothpick to get food out of his teeth and then immediately throw it away. I don't know what happened to this compromise. I mourn that compromise.
Somehow Andy has completely ignored my toothpick requests and the worst part of it is I FIND THEM EVERYWHERE. In the couch, on the floor, stuck to dirty plates, even IN BED. I don't know how that last one happened, but my friend Jackie witnessed it because she was in my room looking at my clothes when I discovered it.

Jackie also witnessed the piercing of my foot by a stray toothpick that was on the floor, which happened a few weeks after the bed incident.

It boggles my mind that we can have mature arguments and agreements and discussions and whatnot, but Andy continues to resist the toothpick compromise. It's a good thing he's so darn good looking.

a big update and then a bunch of chatter over coupons. just to warn you haters.

I have been in Kentucky since Monday (I thought we were going to TN but our hotel was a few miles inside KY) visiting my sister-in-law Melissa, her husband Larry and their new baby girl, Jaiden. My mother-in-law and I did the drive together and yesterday on our way up 81 we stopped in Harrisonburg to pick Andy up and continued on to Strasburg, where we met my parents for dinner. Afterwards Barb continued on to Winchester and Andy and I drove home in our new van!

Big news: My parents sold us their Honda Odyssey! Even though I'm not a mom yet, after Andy's car died we both decided we should look for a vehicle that would hold future babies + our dog Casey. We were hoping my parents would consider selling the van and we are so happy to own it! It is the nicest van. Leather, heated seats, DVD player, lots of room...and my favorite: volume control on the steering wheel.  :)

Andy now drives "my" Camry (it's going to be weird to call it his now) which means he finally gets to have AC and a working radio/CD player! As sad as he was to say goodbye to his beloved Mitsubishi Mirage, I think a part of him is relieved to no longer sweat the whole way home from work.

After he left for work today I got to work organizing all the coupons my Mom had brought me and headed out to CVS, Bed Bath and Beyond, Target and Kohls. I saved $40 at CVS (spent $61), saved $10 at Bed Bath and Beyond (spent $26), saved $16 at Target (spent $85), and saved $55 at Kohls (spent $21). While I still spent a lot of money: $193 total, but I saved a total of $121! The ONLY thing I bought for myself that I don't need was a $1 small blue bin from Target that I plan on using for stashing my many lipsticks and glosses and balms.

I have been doing a LOT of shopping lately, and it's time to put a stop to some things:
-- no going to Bath and Body Works until 2011, even though I keep getting amazing coupons. I have enough hand soap to last me until then.
-- no more candles unless they are for gifts.
-- no more shampoo, body wash or deodorant for Andy
-- no more razors or shave gel for me
-- no buying makeup unless I'm getting Extra Care Bucks (or it's on sale) AND I have a manufacturer's coupon
-- no buying pens or notebooks (sniff)

I'm exhausted.

saturday

foreword: the engine on andy's car completely overheated on wednesday night. we have to get a second car. this was our last month paying off student loans, so this was both good timing and bad timing. also, I leave for TN on monday, andy has very little time off right now, and I need a car by the 28th which is when I go back to work.

Saturday

8ish: move from bed to couch where I sleep peacefully until

9: andy comes downstairs and laughs at my curled-up-ness. I make muffins and we discuss cars. andy gets overwhelmed and angry because this has been the worst week ever for him at work, and he doesn't want to spend his much-needed down time before another long day at work talking about a car he wishes we didn't have to buy. he takes his muffins and coffee and goes upstairs to cool down. I feel torn because a part of me wants to give him massages and kisses and make it better, yet the other part of me is realistic and knows we have to get the car figured out ASAP.

9:40: andy apologizes for his crankies and pulls me to my feet for a big bear hug. we watch the two SNL videos that are on the previous post.

10: we arrive at the Toyota dealership and test drive the model we had researched online

11:30: we get home and freak out about how much we liked the vehicle, then do more online research

12:25: andy and I stand in the doorway to kiss goodbye and he smiles at me and says, "God is good. I'm getting excited about having a new car, and I'm realizing more and more how awesome it is that we won't be paying two loans at the same time." He leaves for work. I fall in love with him a million times over.

Now it is 2:34, and since then I have made pizza dough for strombolis, chatted with K Stoops for a while when she brought over pics for me to edit, found a show on hulu that I'm dying to watch and cleaned the kitchen. Oh, and I've also looked at the car a million times online. :)

a lesson from jake and vienna. really.

confession: I watch the Bachelorette. and enjoy it.

after tonight's episode ABC held an interview with Jake (the most recent Bachelor) and Vienna, the woman he proposed to at the end of the season. they are in a tabloid war and are tossing accusations back in forth in a crazy he said she said whirlwind.

Girls, I suggest you find the interview when it's put online and watch/listen carefully. Regardless of what really happened between Jake and Vienna, the way they handled conflict was to me SO telling of the differences between men and women.

During the interview Vienna complained that Jake was not as loving, compassionate, friendly or touchy-feely as he was when they were first engaged. She said the man she fell in love with was all of those things. She said she enjoyed being around him, but now he is distant and she is lonely and has to beg for kisses. Jake responded by saying he fell in love with Vienna because she was supportive, fun to be around, smart. He felt challenged by her (in a good way). Now he says she is disrespectful, undermining, selfish. She plays games with him/tests him.

LISTEN UP. Women want to be romanced (in some way shape or form- hopefully she can communicate her needs and wants). We want to be pursued. We don't want to have to beg for kisses. Yet, as Jake pointed out, how can a man give a woman those things when he is feeling so disrespected by her? Men want respect! It's in the Bible-- God commands men to love their wives and commands women to respect their husbands. That is intentional. He doesn't command women to love (in that verse), or men to respect. Someone at church said "a woman can love an enemy, but she can't respect him/her. A man can respect an enemy, but cannot love him/her." Think on that!

It is so easy for women to disrespect the man she loves when she is not feeling loved, and for men to not show love to their wives because they are not being respected.

Vienna interrupted Jake constantly during the interview, even when he pointed out to her that interrupting made him feel disrespected. She continued to interrupt and when he blew a fuse and raised his voice, she burst into tears and said "see what I have to put up with?"

Sadly, that part of the interview hit waaay too close to home for me. I used to think to myself "is this really what I have to put up with?" I never thought back then that Andy was probably thinking the same thing! I used to be over-emotional, which only confuses and frustrates men. I used to think I was always right. I would pray that Andy would change because if he didn't, how would I go on living and loving him? It's almost laughable now. Almost. See, now I am able to recognize that I do things that hurt Andy too. I am wrong (most of the time). I can display my emotions and express my disappointment through carefully worded sentences instead of tearfests. I pray for changes to occur in me instead of Andy (and when I do pray for him I try to do it unselfishly).

maybe Vienna cheated. maybe Jake is a fame whore. regardless, their relationship was made up of a woman who needed love and a man who needed respect.

If you're reading this and thinking how can a woman show a man respect if he is not loving her? then you are asking a question I have asked myself. What I discovered was I had to focus on the large percentage of what I love and adore about Andy rather than the small percentage of what I don't.

If you were a man, what would you hope for in a partner? Are you giving those things to your man? Does he know what you need from him? Here's a conversation starter:

ask your man: what gives you confidence in our relationship? how can I better respect you? what is something I could change right now to make our relationship better for you?

have him ask you the same questions but replace the word "respect" with the word "love."

a tuesday, in true ramble style.

I finished "The Glass Castle" by Jeannette Walls last night. All I can say is...wow. That woman had one heck of a childhood. Read it.

Today I kissed, held, fed and changed little ones, then came home and passed out for a few minutes before Bible study. We had an amazing dinner of "loaded" salad with brownies and ice cream for dessert and talked about conflict and confrontation within the church. I love these women and their hearts for the Lord.

I came back to an empty house (Andy works until 11pm) and read a document on Becker family history (Becker is my maiden name). I am so proud of my family's history and love to learn about the people who have influenced me and whose blood is inside me. My cousin Joe said at my grandpa's funeral earlier this year, "Becker's don't have an identity crisis." I love that! It is so true. I am so grateful to my uncle Jim for compiling family history and making it incredibly simple for everyone in the family to learn about our ancestors.

On a completely different note, Andy just got home and Casey, in her excitement, got caught up in his tie while giving him kisses and sniffing him all over.

:)

answers to prayers

God has been busy working in my life (andy's too). This time last year I had very few friends in town who had time to spend w/ me, I was discontent and frustrated with our home and we were going to a church that we liked but we weren't meeting people and had little desire to get involved. I prayed send me friends. Remind me of how great this house is. Convict me to be more diligent in cleaning and to find pleasure in it. Help us find a church home where we receive solid teaching, fellowship and a passion for serving.

God is so faithful.

I have incredible new(ish) friends in my life. The selfish attitude of "why am I not getting attention?" is changing into an attitude of "how can I give others attention?"

I have received a new attitude about our house as well. We're in a new house, which I LOVE because I really let myself go loose on decorating and had fun with it. I recognized that the feeling of overwhelming..ness.. over silly things like laundry and dishes and dog hair and dust and that will take SO much time to clean was completely ridiculous and guess what Mom, it really DOES only take a few minutes to hang my clothes up instead of tossing them on the dresser! It only took me twenty-three years to figure it out!

We started going back to Aletheia after two years of church-hopping and while we know no church is perfect, we have found such truth and love there, in the teaching and in the people. We're learning new things and reading new things and now when we're arguing we are better equipped on how to respond to one another in love, how to turn the conflict around and forgive each other quickly and move on and forget.

So rare are my posts about my faith, and it didn't really bother me until lately. I wanted this blog to be light-hearted and fun and bring my readers pleasure. I didn't want to turn away readers. That was stupid. My faith is me, and I don't want to ever hide that.

a muffin tale

It happened one lazy, sticky Monday afternoon in June. The girl was frustrated at herself for watching several episodes of Design Star on Hulu. Her feet had fallen asleep. Her back ached from being curled on the couch. The dog dozed in the corner, letting out occasional puffs of gas and filling the air with a vomit-inducing stench. This cannot be good, the girl decided. I can't spend all afternoon sitting in a room of fart. This is not how I intended on spending my days off. She contemplated her options. Clean? The house is spotless. Read? I need a break, I think I've overdosed on reading. Shop? What for? I don't want to spend money today. Exercise? I already lifted weights while watching Design Star...that should count. Besides, it's too hot to go outside. Bake? What? Bake? Bake! MUFFINS! The girl clicked out of Hulu and immediately began researching. She made a mental inventory of her pantry and decided on whole wheat banana muffins with honey. The day was looking up.

Once on her feet and in the kitchen, the girl began lining up the ingredients alongside measuring cups and spoons. She decided to halve the original recipe based on her limited amount of flour, banana and eggs. Mashing the bananas was satisfying, but when a large glop flew out of the bowl and slid down the side of the refrigerator, the girl began to lose it. You've got to be kidding me. What if we get ants? Do mice like bananas? I don't want to get mice. Ugh. She took a breath and moved on to her next task. Half a cup of honey seems like an awful lot, she mused. She measured a quarter cup of honey and realized as she began stirring the batter that she had never taken notice of the actual directions. Whoops. Well, who cares. I doubt it really matters. OK, what else can I add... applesauce, cinnamon, nutmeg, walnuts, raisins...WHAT THE!!! The girl leaned forward and peered into the mixing bowl. Somehow, while adding raisins, the plastic bag inside the raisin box slipped out and nose-dived into the batter. She fished out the bag, now covered in goop, and threw the whole thing into the trash. She spooned the batter into the tin as calmly as possible and placed the muffins in the oven.

Why did I even bother? I can't do anything right. I should be organizing something, or on the elliptical at the gym, or sipping an iced coffee and reading at Barnes and Noble. Why am I making such a mess out of things? I really wish I hadn't thrown out the whole bag of raisins.

The girl didn't want to think anymore. She put on Incubus and did the dishes and sponged up batter goop and putzed around until the timer went off and worked on her short story while the muffins cooled. Then she scooped one out and took a bite.

Mmmmm.

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Laura's Whole Wheat Naturally Sweetened Muffins

makes 1 dozen muffins.

preheat oven to 325.

1 and 3/4 cup whole wheat flour

1 tsp baking soda

1/2 tsp salt

2 Tbsp canola oil

1/2 cup unsweetened applesauce (I used an individual container, they are 4oz)

1/4 cup honey

2 eggs

1 cup mashed banana

1/4 cup hot water

1 Tbsp cinnamon

2 tsp nutmeg

1/8 cup raisins (trust me: they won't be hard and chewy, they'll be little puffs of sweetness)

1/8 cup walnuts

Bake for 20 minutes. Test muffins and if they aren't ready, turn oven down to 300 and bake for at least 5 additional minutes. This kept my muffins from becoming too dark.

Normally I would suggest following a recipe's directions, but I didn't even follow the ingredients so naturally I didn't follow directions. I literally dumped everything into one mixing bowl, whisked it all together and called it a day.

They were perfectly sweet-- I think the added raisins made up for the 1/4 cup of honey I didn't use. I loved how the raisins puffed up from the moisture inside the muffins. I love my banana nut muffins with chocolate chips, which you can check out here, but these are MUCH healthier and just as satisfying. Try them. Tell me what you think.

a success

My close friend Becca visited from Charlottesville last night and stayed over. Yesterday we ate ice cream at Klines, realized we were still starving and split a meal at Chick-fil-A and rented "It's Complicated." Today we made parfaits for breakfast and then went shopping with a few goals in mind: I wanted to get a new knick-knack for the house and Becca was looking for a graduation gift for her sister and a basil plant for herself. We went to the farmer's market and a few shops downtown, then drove to Bridgewater and came back down 42 to hit my favorite shop in Dayton, The Cottage. By then we had each found what we were looking for. I got an adorable small cream colored antique fan with light brown blades, she got her basil and a gorgeous silver bracelet for her sister.

We lunched at Union Station in town and shared nachos and a chicken sandwich. The nachos were hands down the best I've ever had-- chorizo sausage, red beans, corn, mixed cheeses, tomatoes and peppers.

After lunch we ran to Wal Mart and Bed Bath and Beyond for a few things. By the time we got home our feet were screaming. We soaked them in hot water with minty bubble bath and painted our toes. For dinner we made steak, corn on the cob and mashed potatoes, and for dessert we had brownie sundaes.

The best part about hanging out with an old friend is the way conversation happens effortlessly. As much as my friends and I enjoy exploring the areas where we live, we are just as happy to curl up on a couch with coffee and simply catch up. We try on each other's clothes and shoes, tease each other about things we did when we were younger and laugh constantly, but we also ask each other the hard, honest questions and give each other straightforward advice.

Every visit with an old friend is a blessing, a treasure.

Definitely a successful day(s).

time flies

an excerpt from a post on Girl's Gone Child about how far the author has come since she started her blog in 2005:

Every day we become a little more interesting. A little more balanced. A little more successful in our ability to understand and know and care and love and come to conclusions about things.

Like gardens and how you can't tell how fast they've grown until you return from vacation.

This last line really hit me. When Andy and I left for PA yesterday afternoon we noticed one of our lilies had opened up. When we pulled back into our driveway an hour ago we noticed another bloom. Such change in only 48 hours.

In 2005 I graduated high school and moved waaay too much stuff into a tiny dorm room at James Madison University. I met my future husband a few weeks later. I saw firsthand the damage created by Hurricane Katrina and cried through the demolition. I shared secrets and laughs and tears with new friends. I traveled to Alaska, Ireland and England. I was proposed to. I said yes. I doodled bridal dresses on the margins of my notebook. I got married and went on a honeymoon. We shared a house together. I took my first pregnancy test. We got a dog. We drove to Florida and cruised to the Bahamas. I traveled to Seoul with my family. I graduated college, almost missing my graduation due to the stomach flu. We celebrated our first year anniversary at the beach, sharing year-old wedding cake with 18 friends. We discussed finances, jobs, moving, babies, traveling, church, cars and where we wanted to be in 5 years. We moved to new house. We celebrated two years of marriage.

Man, have I learned.