let's talk babies

disclaimer: not preg. also, this blog post has the attention span of a baby.

BABIEEEZZZZ!!

I love me some babies. Baby cheeks. Baby necks. Baby toes. (Baby clothes.) Naked babies. Baby smiles.

Even though it's occasionally hard for me when I see someone w/ a bump or a baby on their hip, I consider myself blessed to have many incredible mommy friends. They let me fawn all over their babies. They tell me all of the honest-but-kinda gross truths about labor and being a mom. They admit to not knowing it all. They don't pretend to have it all together (but they never cease to amaze me anyway). They say they can't imagine life without their little one, but still advise me to cherish my pre-baby life.

My pre-baby life consists of sleeping a lot, drinking more coffee than I should, fitting into all of the clothes I wear, reading whenever I want, taking baths and long showers, making plans on a whim, filling my purse with things only intended for me...

....

....

occasionally bringing up baby names... (Andy would say "constantly")

standing in the "future baby room" and imagining where everything will go...

constantly resisting the urge to look at baby stuff on Pinterest...

pointing out cute babies everywhere...

reading mommy blogs (tearing! hair on your belly! cankles! zits! back labor! oh boy!)...

creating a "baby and me" wishlist on Amazon so I don't forget certain items I like (SO EMBARRASSING)

having everyone and their mother ask me when we're going to have a baby (you know I love that one)...

....

and being content in my current baby-less state while also happily anticipating what God has in store for us.

come on girl! you got to get back up!

this is how I've been feeling about blogging:

this frizzy girl has got to get back up. can I get a sassy mmmhmmm up in herr?

just try not to feel slightly better about life after having all that soul poured into your ears like sweet, sweet honey.

then listen to all of their other songs.

especially this one.

get ready, tomorrow we're talkin bout BABIEEEZZZZ!

conversations with an eight-year-old

I love everything princess. And animals. I LOVE animals.

If the movie makes you cry I'll get you a tissue. I'm very thoughtful. If anyone was hurt I would help them. Except for robbers. But anyone else I would help.

My friend Zach went to the space museum so he knows everything about space and he told me and now I know.
I want to go to the space museum.
Okay, I'll talk to Zach and see if he can take you.
Is Zach a kid or an adult?
He's a kid. So maybe I'll talk to his parents and you can go with them next time. Then there would be two parents and one...*pause*... adult that owns a dog.

There's this dolphin and her fin gets stuck in a crab trap and this little boy helps her and they try to make her a new fin but she doesn't like them. They make maybe ten fins in real life but they only show three in the movie. She bangs them against the wall and they break. They hurt her skin.
What happens?
I'm not going to give away the ending! I'm at the beginning part. There's still a middle part.
*proceeds to tell me everything about the movie*

It's a kids movie. Kids aren't allowed to watch adult movies. Do you watch adult movies? They have guns and stuff. Like the "s" word. Except not the "s" word that is a bad word. The other "s" word.
Sex?
Yea.
Umm... yes, sometimes we watch movies that have guns and the "s" word in them. But we look away during the bad parts.
Why do you have to look away?
Sometimes people don't have clothes on and we don't look at other people naked because we're married and we can only see each other naked.
Right, 'cuz you're Andy's family.

I'll remember this one always - totally unexpected. Out of the mouths of babes, right?
This room has a bunch of furniture in it. One day it will be a baby room.
I hope you get everything you wish for.

my niece Laurel four years ago

foster care in the Valley

I wrote this article last summer for Bloom, a features magazine for women in the Valley. I had the most fun interviewing these sources (sweet Kim provided paper for the brainless journalist who forgot her notebook and Phil and Jana insisted I take a ride on their zipline before heading back to the newsroom). 


Click here to read article in another window

this is good

I'm toying with my french fries, trying to express the sadness in my heart. Bethany looks at me from across the table and gently says, "I get it. I didn't want to move here. I'm still grieving."


That's what it is I thought, nodding my head and letting the truth of her words sink in.

I'm still grieving.

The world didn't stop when we moved. Life moves on. Schedules get filled. The best intentions aren't always turned into actions.

You've been in these shoes before, or maybe you're in them now. I've watched my friends go through it. One by one, we all leave the cozy little nest of a community we made. Now that community is sustained through gchat, phone calls and Facebook comments. I miss you. I miss you, too. 

Oh, but I ache to be near them. To sit shoulder to shoulder doing a crossword, to laugh hysterically over awkward stories, to run my fingers over their books, to kiss the cheeks of their babies, to linger over coffee with them.

I hope as I drive back to Frederick from Harrisonburg on Sunday that I will have the ability to acknowledge that while that was so good, this is good, too. That while my heart turns violently inside of my chest, I won't have time to maintain my regrets because I will be thinking about how He loves us, oh how he loves.